Story: Son that never was

jatinder sat in dark room with lights off, as usual watching his love’s photograph in the camera of mobile phone. All he use to do was getting lost in memories of old days, which were not there anymore but he could never accept the reality. shivani was no more in his life he kept on living with the memories that he spent six months back. His room was dark has his soul he never liked light, dark curtains door closed this was how his room was from last few months. he was not as jubilant as he was, he was not lively as before, not in good health he was a mere depressed soul since he departed from his love.parteek’s mom was widow her husband died when he was just 10 years old. Since then she raised her children. Elder daughter baljinder was married a year back and she was living in Mumbai. jatinder was from a small village of Punjab in sangrur.

Gurjit raised both her children well both of them were well educated and provided all the facilities a single mother could do. She had been working in mill in which her husband worked since her husband died she started working there. With all here saving s she married her daughter and now expected her son to help family with finances and to mange things at home. But things were turning out to be just exactly the opposite to what she thought. Her dreams shattered, she knew her son was no more like what he was,

One day gurjit was sitting in her room remembering old days, when her husband use to say to his brilliant son “my son would become engineer “ how jatinder was so fond of  playing with cars and planes. Suddenly a voice from the other room “can you hear me I want some money. Do you listen to me you are the worst mother.”  This was not the first time her son made her listen to this hundred times a day. “if you think you will get money for drugs its not going to happen.” This was the reality of her son, from whom she expected so much but he was just a drug addict who forgot all his duties. Since his break up he could never keep his mental health stable and ended up with evil drugs. Gurjit tried every little thing she could to make her son to live the life he use to six months back. Finally she decided, she thought now only place left for her son is rehabilitation centre.

She went to his room and said “son you are not leaving any option for me, I have decided you are not staying in this place anymore.” Next day gurjit packed his bags and sent him to rehabilitation centre with a hope that her son would be same as before. After leaving him there she came back home and was surprised to see her son saying “mom am back and would never hurt you ever again and will always take care of you, He would be a wonderful son.” But suddenly she opened her eyes and realized that it was just a dream. Days passed she never even gave a thought that she should go to visit him, she was sick of listening to same old things all he wanted was money for drugs. How could a mother let her son fall into hell? On the other hand place where jitender was spending his days was nothing less than hell. He was ill treated, beaten sometimes was made to starve. Two months had gone by. Finally she decided to see her son and she went with a positive attitude that her son must have changed.

She was happy and went with excitement, but what she saw broke her heart she was in tears. Her son was chained; he was not even allowed to move out of bed. He looked weak and pale. Gurjit couldn’t stop crying, it seemed like he never had good food and care. Her heart shattered seeing this. She took all his luggage and decided she won’t let her son die this way in life full of misery. She decided to take him back home. Both mother and son got back home. Jatinder had almost started hating her mother for what she did but of course he never understood a heart of mother. Though to some extent he was staying away from drugs, but still urge was there. Memory of his past love was alive in his heart. He was successful in overcoming this heart break.

Year passed this way, a mother was seeing her son sad state of mind since once year, still she had no idea what she should do that her son would smile again. There was nobody to support gurjit she was doing it all alone from office to home management to her son’s health and fighting drug addiction evil. Things continued in the same manner. Jitender kept on asking for money and drugs and she refused to offer him any money. What more a mother could do to save her own son. Nobody in society treated her mother in respectful manner every passer by just said “look her son is drug addict he does nothing a jobless fellow. What kind of mother is she? Maybe she dint raised her children well. All this was common and gurjit went through all this every day. But her son never realized her pain. He never tried to improve.

One day she was in her room watching television when she heard his son crying and shouting. She ran and went to his room, when she saw him she couldn’t control her emotions. She was helpless she could not see his pain. A son pleading for money it looked like he would die if he is not given money for drugs. Now a mother was helpless, this time she refused to be a cold hearted mother. She thought my son is in pain and if buying drugs once can make him feel relaxed I will do that. So she went to jeweler and sold all her jewels. She needed money for drugs. A mother refused to see tears in his son’s eyes. She was shattered and could not think of anything else. All her savings were spent, she had nothing left for her future all she had in her hand was salary she use to get. But she refused to worry about her all she wanted was her son, living with a hope her son is going stand by her side forever.

Days passed things continued in the same manner, a mother kept on fulfilling son’s wishes. She knew she was being the cause of slow death of her son she was letting him consume slow poison. But seeing her son cry and shout all day was not a option for her. Life was becoming more hopeless with every passing day but gurjit kept on thinking someday her son would be same as before. On the other hand jitender was falling into deeper hell losing sense to realize difference between good and bad. He was sad and depressed he lost all his to overcome this trauma.

Gurjit came back home at seven in the evening and she was surprised everything was quiet her son was no more shouting. She quickly ran to his room and she was delighted to see he made tea for himself and for his mother. she thought nothing on this earth can be more joy giving. Both of them had good talk ,did dinner together. Gurjit went to her room for sleeping, after long she thought she would have good sleep her son made her proud all her hard work and love for her son finally showed result.  She slept peacefully that night her son was not crying anymore.

In morning she went to his room to wake him up. She froze couldn’t utter a word almost fainted could not understand what has happened. “Dear mom I wanted to be a good son I wanted to see happiness in your eyes and I saw that yesterday, I was so jubilant to see you smiling. Am happy I saw you this way. Now I don’t have guilt I fulfilled your and my wish.”  This was the last message from her son. She crumbled the paper and started crying aloud. He was no more, dreams of a mother shattered. She was left all alone to die alone to live alone a pain was going to accompany all her life. If only word called alcohol and drugs never existed a son would have been a support of a lonely mother.